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poebae
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Name: Graham
Country: Australia
Metro: Sydney
Birthday: 6/13/1985
Gender: Male
Interests: JESUS, soccer, fútbol, fußball, voetbal, calcio, kaduregel, kurat al qadam, jalkapallo, piłka nożna.
Occupation: Artist
Industry: Entertainment
Message: message me
Member Since:
10/18/2003
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| I'm sorry...
We had a great run and lots of good memories, but I've found someone younger, leaner, more flexible...
You were once the best-looking one in town and everyone wanted in on the action, but amidst the popularity you kind of let yourself go.
I'd talk about my new love and our relationship... maybe I'd even name names... but at the moment, I'm Pressed for Words.
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My car was broken into last Friday.
Well... not really broken into. This is kind of embarassing... after
going straight to Woolies after work on Thursday night and shopping
until midnight for all of the food and drinks we'd need for our road
trip, I was too tired to think straight and hadn't properly closed one
of my car doors.
When I got to my car, I saw paper and various objects from my glove box
scattered on the floor. After wondering for about 5 seconds when I'd
become such a messy person, I realised that someone had been rummaging
through my car. My iPod was missing, as well as the plastic bag full of
shrapnel I had been meaning to deposit (about $120 worth).
I later learned that a lot of the food for the road trip had been
stolen, along with two bottles of wine and a case of beer (God bless
Australia). They'd seen my passport, but thankfully left that in the
car. I'm prepared to let go of the material things, but it felt dirty
knowing that someone had been inside my car looking through my stuff...
while my car was sitting in the private parking lot in my apartment
block.
Maybe it was the fact that I was going to dawn service that prevented
anger and bitterness from being my first reaction. Instead, I decided
to pray for whomever had stolen from me. I forgave them, decided that I
wouldn't make an effort to track them down, and prayed that they'd
listen to the awesome sermons I'd put on the iPod that week.
I even thought of leaving a note on my windshield saying "Thanks for
leaving my passport, I appreciate that. I recommend John Piper and Paul
Washer's sermons, they're great. We should meet up some time; here's my
number, give me a call". It would be a story straight out of a book :)
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I just walked into the common room during my 10 minute break to grab a coffee. As I stood there shaking my sugar sachet, my ears involuntarily tuned into the evening news.
There was a report on osteoporosis in women, alerting the general public to the large number of Australian women who suffer from OP each year. To drive the point home, the reporter followed up with:
"That's enough women to fill 180 jumbo jets".
How on earth does that clarify the picture, or help people understand the gravity of the situation? I wasn't aware that "jumbo jet-fuls" was a commonly cited unit of measure.
"Oh, three thousand people died? No big deal, really..."
"No big deal!? Dude, that's EIGHT jumbo jets."
"Oh my gosh, eight!? I didn't realise! That's so much for clearing that up for me."
Imagine that all these people have osteporosis. Now multiply that by 180.
Z.O.M.G.
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I really don't understand how people who don't have the slighest idea how to use computers end up with corporate office jobs, working all day in front of... a computer. I got a call from a corporate client saying that he had to reset his Windows password, but it kept rejecting his new password. I asked him what he was trying to input, and the conversation goes: "I press S, exclamation mark, b, w" "Wait, exclamation mark? You can't have that in your password. You can only have letters and numbers." "Oh, okay. I'll try something else then. (typing)... it still doesn't work" "What did you type in this time?" "S, @, b, w ""........" --
I've noticed a disturbing trend these days: people holding conversations in "Appear Offline" mode in Gmail chat. I've got no problem with people valuing their privacy or just plain not wanting to talk to anyone, because I feel that way 95% of the time. It irks me, though, when I'm chatting with someone and "X is currently offline. He/she may not receive your chat" is constantly staring me in the face. It's not that I consider it dishonest or anything, but it's kind of like having a face to face conversation with someone while holding in front of your face a tissue with holes for your eyes and mouth.
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| I've always had a love-hate relationship with words and language.
See I'm all about them words.
Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words
Hundreds of pages, pages, pages forwards
More words then I had ever heard and I feel so alive
I love the power of words and lyrics and poetry, but at the same time there are several things I hate about them.
I hate my lack of mastery over words, and the way that I stumble over them because I'm always trying to choose them so carefully. I've had someone tell me "I've never met anyone who thinks while they're talking like you do". It's frustrating though, because I always fear that whomever I'm talking to is missing the nuances and the exact point that I'm getting at.
I hate the way words constantly fail to express my deepest and most heartfelt thoughts, which leaves me standing there stuttering and hesitating because I don't want to construct so mediocre a sentence to express such . I consider myself somewhat in touch with the basic protocols of social interaction though, and I'm aware that nobody wants to wait around all day while I try to think of the perfect way to express myself, so in the end I settle for what little I can piece together from my limited vocabulary. That's probably why I prefer to write than to speak; it affords me the luxury of leaving blank spaces which can be filled in later.
Anyway, that's not what I set out to write about today.
As the title says, Watch. Your. Words.
I'm growing increasingly disdainful of people who subconsciously manipulate people and justify their actions using their words.
Take, for example, the simple statement "I can't make it".
I can't make it.
When you say "I can not", what is this saying? That you don't have the ability? That you're physically unable? If I ask a quadriplegic if he can perform a cartwheel or the little girl down the street if she can bench press 200kg, then fair enough, they cannot. But if I ask if you're free on Wednesday to come and clean the mildew off my bathroom tiles and you say "Sorry, I can't. I have to help my parents with something", I don't buy it.
Before I continue, let me clarify that I'm not nitpicking over meanings here: I'm talking about the intention with which people use these words.
If I mentioned that I'd give you twelve million dollars to clean my bathroom, I know you'd scratch through the door with your fingernails to get in. So when you say "I can't" in this particular case, you're referring to your preference rather than your ability. But of course, it's much easier to say "I can't", than "I'd really prefer not to", because "I can't" shifts the responsibility to some external force over which you have no control. Supplementing that with "I have to" really adds weight to the statement, because it serves a similar purpose.
That brings me to my next point.
I'll take the liberty of assuming that "have to" can be translated to "must".
must
* to be under the necessity to; need to: "Animals must eat to live."
* to be inevitably certain to; be compelled by nature: "Everyone must die."
Do you see the weight of the words you so easily throw around? What are these horrendous consequences you speak of? I have to go to my piano lesson? I have to meet my girlfriend tonight? No! You choose to. Don't get me wrong; I'm not saying that piano lessons and relationships aren't important, but you're a free person and nobody can force you to do anything. You can hold a gun to my head and say "Give me all of your money, or I'll blow your brains out", and I'm pretty darn sure I'd hand over my wallet before my life, but that's far from saying that I have no choice.
"I don't have time."
This sentence is one of the worst offenders.
Did little Billy really not have time to do his maths homework? Of course not; he probably sat on his butt watching TV for 6 hours yesterday, then had to go to sleep, but because TV has such a high priority in his life, he would've perceived that lack of time between the end of his favourite show and bedtime as a lack of choice. Of course this is an extreme example, and any fool could see that little Billy could use a beating.
Why, though, do people feel so easily justified in saying "I don't have time", just because they're 15 years older than little Billy? So you go to university and go clubbing on weekends and meet your boyfriend on Monday nights... are all of these not choices you make? Wait, you "don't have time" to meet up for a coffee because you're busy all week? How about "I didn't make time during the week?" Again, there's nothing inherently wrong with that, but "I'm too busy" just doesn't fly with me...
By the way, I know what you're thinking, and no I'm not saying this as a result of being stood up or anything like that, nor am I yelling this from atop my high horse. I'd never claim that I have all my priorities straight or that I manage my time perfectly, but as I become more aware of what I'm saying, I make an effort to be honest with my words instead of deflecting the blame for my own mistakes.
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Practical applications:
Question: "Hey? Can you come to my party next week?"
Rejected typical answer: A: "Nah, sorry, I have to hand in an assignment the next day"
Brutal honesty: "Nah, I'm going to take it easy and leave my work till the last minute, because I'd rather enjoy my weekend than go to your stupid party"
The somewhat more socially acceptable answer: "Sorry, I'll be at home working on an assignment that night".
I love it. It's honest, it doesn't shift any responsiblity off your own shoulders. You might not think it makes a big difference, and to be honest it probably doesn't to most people, but taking control of words also gives you control over your actions.
Question: "Can you come to training this week?"
Rejected typical answer: A: "Nah, I probably can't make it"
What you're really saying: "There's absolutely no way I'll be there, but adding that 'probably' cushions the blow a little, doesn't it?"
Just say: "Nah, sorry mate."
I could go on...
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| I had an interesting dream earlier this week.
I was dying. Terminally ill.
I wasn't sad or anxious or anything like that. Everything was pretty much the same, except I knew I only had 3 days to live.
So my imagined conversations went:
"Hey Graham, are you going to that party next Friday?"
"Nah, I can't. I'll be dead, remember?"
"Oh yeah."
In the finale, I was alone in my room the night before I was 'scheduled' to die. Again, my feelings were pretty much neutral, and I just sat there wondering what it would be like.
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I'm writing this in Google's new beta browser, "Chrome". It seems very sleek and smooth, and if they add extension support and fill a few other gaps, I can see it achieving in 1 year what Mozilla took 5 years to do.
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